Own your feelings.

watercolor feeling face--j. N-L

I had a dream the other night.

I dreamt that my four year old daughter and I had just started grocery shopping when she began pitching the Queen of all Hissy Fits. This protestation occurred because I, horror of all horrors, had insisted that she ride in the Safeway grocery cart instead of freely careening down each and every aisle.

Now, if you think that a two year old in the throes of a temper tantrum is every mother's nightmare, try watching your four year old....

Instead of becoming embarrassed or angry with her as I normally might, I looked her in the eyes and exclaimed, "Yes! That's it! Now you've got it! Feel your anger!"

I won't bore you with the other dream details; although the horrified faces of nearby shoppers were rather comical....

I'm fairly certain that this dream wasn't about proper parenting, or the ins and outs of managing a pre-schooler's tantrum. That's a whole other subject entirely. No, this dream was about empowering myself and those within my sphere of influence to stop pretending, to feel, and to feel with honesty.

Think about it for a moment. How different might your life be today, if you had been encouraged to feel your feelings as a child? What if you could have felt your four year old anger without shame, or manipulation, or fear of physical punishment?

Would the world really fall off its own axis if we allowed the occaisional temper tantrum to evolve without exerting our own parental judgment and condemnation?

A friend once told that me that until I could own my own feelings, it would be impossible to own my life.

Ohhhh, how I wish I had learned this at four instead of forty four.....